Drawing has been really difficult lately, I can’t explain exactly how or for what reason. I think it may be that I haven’t been drawing as consistently as I have been for the last year, making the process more difficult and the results less satisfying. The effect of this is made worse when you’re used to drawing on a particular level you’ve grown to enjoy and you just aren’t quite hitting that quality at the moment. It’s frustrating. There aren’t those moments in the process where looking at what you’ve done and where the piece is going is exciting and motivating. Where for a minute or two you fool yourself into actually believing you’re a genius or something, which is awesome in small doses. Instead, because the work looks and feels so unfamiliar, it’s a more apathetic and frustrating loss of identity and confidence whenever you step back and look at the progress you’re making. It’s worse when you’re done and the reaction you produce isn’t “I did it!” and is instead “is there anything else that can be done really?”.
Drawing is just more fun when you like what you’re making, and subsequently you make more art because it’s enjoyable. And the more you make art, however good or bad, the better you become. But the only reason you’re making art as fervently as you are in the first place is because it’s fun! It’s a cycle that’s really helpful and promotes growth in artists who make work they enjoy and who work often. When it’s working the cycle of motivation goes like this:
a) Art is fun.
b) Because art is fun I’m drawing a lot.
c) Since I’m drawing a lot I’m also drawing well.
d) Drawing well makes art fun.
(back to a)
So as soon as you get out of practice and the work suffers at all it becomes a cycle of un-motivation.
"This drawing isn’t good, it makes me feel bad and frustrated"
"Well draw something else! Draw more and more so you get better!"
"But it isn’t good… This game sucks. Where are the better games?"
This is probably stating the obvious but it’s just easier when the process is enjoyable and I’m stoked about the things I create. But now that I see this pattern and know the solution it’s conquerable! I just need to work through it, make a hundred shitty drawings and then the 101st will be back to where I was before. And in the meanwhile I can reprogram myself to solve some issues I had with my work before this regression. As long as I’m making art I’m not that happy with, I might as well try drawing things I’m not that good at to begin with and improve those things as well! There’s every likelihood that the work I make once I’m back in practice will be even better than it was before!
In the meantime sorry to my followers on my lack of posts, and in advance of work coming up that may not be what I want to put out or what people expect. I’m just working through things. Maybe I’ll do more write-ups and personal things here in the future too, I feel like a pretty ineffectual blogger and I enjoy so many amazing artists blogs I would like to change that. But this blog will always be 95% original art. Thanks everyone.